FAREWELL MY SUMMER LOVE

It all Started during Summer, years back. It was a normal Sunny Day where light Drizzling made it a Dreamy Scene. Little did I know that Day would later throw gloomy shade on my better days.

When I got Your Msg That day I was more than Happy.
Who wouldn't be? I knew you for a Year but that was going to be the First time we meet. I still remember every little detail of our meet.

A full moon Night that was.
You looked so Handsome in A White Shirt and Blue Denim Jeans. Your smile was a killer. 
Your eyes sparkled with shine as u saw me.
Your smile was so pure.
The Hug you Gave me was full of warmth and love.
The entire combination felt so Filmy yet Real. Is there a Girl who never dreamt of this to happen?? I doubt.

There you sat next to me and were so full of life. You kept on Talking and caressing my hair.
Oh yeah, the countless selfies you took and giggled at every pic with pride.
You held my hands in yours and never let them go even when I had to answer my phone.
Sitting on Grass by the LAKE SIDE and admiring THE FULL MOON, sharing those SWEET NOTHINGS what a Moment it was. 
When those gorgeous girls around us were stealing glances at you, I wondered how your focus was only on me and never bothered to even look at them.

YOU MADE ME FEEL AS IF I AM YOUR QUEEN.
When the time came for me to leave, your eyes were so shaken that you took all the pain to travel 2 hours to drop me at my place.
THIS WAS NOTHING LESS THAN A DREAM DATE FOR ANY GIRL.
That hug you gave when you left,I still remember how you struggled to let me go.
I was so moved by this total meet that by the time You left I realized YOU ARE MY MOON.The Moon that brightened a SUMMER NIGHT.
THAT SUMMER DAY and DATE WERE ETCHED ON MY HEART SO DEEPLY.

Little did I know the following days would be no less than Hell for me.

Hours Turned into Days and Days into months..I kept on waiting for your Msg, your reply, Your call.
You were no where to be found.
Your Watsapp Showed You Online But all my Msgs stayed unopened for days.
Your FB was full of pics of Your Happy smiles But I wasn't one of them.
I wondered what happened suddenly that THE MAN WHO ROCKED MY WORLD WITH HIS LOVE DIDN'T EVEN CARE TO LOOK BACK AT ME.

I started feeling so Insecure and Inferior. I felt may be I did a Mistake to offend you. I thought may be I wasn't good enough for you.
To suppress these painful thoughts from piercing my already broken Heart...
To stop myself from waiting endlessly for ur Msg..
To keep myself away from Depression..
The only solace was A SLEEPING PILL A DAY.
How unfortunate even in my DREAMS You appeared out of no where. EVERYTIME I LOOKED AT THE MOON, I FELT SOMETHING PIERCE MY HEART.

Weeks turned into months and Then You Appeared Suddenly one day As if nothing Happened. As if all the pain I felt was a bad nightmare. When you said YOU WERE BUSY WITH WORK all this while I  thought may be I was mistaken and nothing changed. 

Finally when we met This time, its different.
I was the one so eager to see you,
To click pics with you,
To go out with you,
To spend time with you,
To have lunch with you, 
To speak a lot with you...
In all this process , I found out you were the least interested.

The Spark in your eyes flashed only when you were checking Your Phone.
Sitting next to a Person doesn't definitely indicate being with that person. 
Yeah, you were next to me But way out of my Reach.
When you said You have someone else in Your Life,
I saw you off with a smile on my face that night.
THAT MOMENT I KNEW IT WAS A FAREWELL TO U.

Our beginning was Beautiful but that doesn't guarantee our end has to be Beautiful too...
All the years of pain my heart went through, I wanted to compensate it by spending some time with you. 
But sorry to say this, 
YOU WERE NOT WORTH IT.

The Question will always remain for me "Did You Really Deserve My Heart even for a Second?"

THE MOON THAT I ADORE FROM AFAR, 
THE MOON THAT MADE ME FALL IN LOVE,
THE MOON THAT GAVE ME BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES...
IS BUSY SHINING ON SOMEONE ELSE.

Shine to ur brightest My Summer Love As YOU TOOK AWAY MY SMILE and That's What making You Shine.

You came to my life just Like a BRIGHT SUMMER LOVE but you ended up BURNING MY HEART. No relation should be forced. WHAT FLOWS FLOWS, WHAT CRASHES CRASHES. The Moon Still reminds me of YOU, of US. 

Tonight as I sit alone and Stare at the Sky,
THE MOON IS SHINING BRIGHT and 
STARS SPARKLING WITH THEIR MIGHT.
I FELL IN LOVE ALL OVER ONCE AGAIN. 
THIS TIME WITH MYSELF.

And Tonight I tell you My Dear, 
YOU WERE ONCE MY MOON but YOU FADED TOO SOON.
Yet with all the Memories you gave me, I take a leave from you as I Turn My Back on You. Shine on whom you choose to. That's the Gift I give you. 
Thank you for making me realize that Every Dream bears Some Weight, every love leaves some pain.
FAREWELL MY SUMMER LOVE. 💝⚘

The Cost of A RUMOUR - A LIFE

This is my Personal Experience I went through recently. Am pretty sure by the time you finish reading this, you too will relate to this.
I always believe in One Saying ...
"PAY HEED TO HOW PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT OTHERS TO YOU.. WHEN THEY ARE NOT AROUND.
BECAUSE THAT EXACTLY IS HOW THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT YOU TO OTHERS."

There is a Man (will call him A) I came across with a few years back.
Every once in a while we used to communicate (now we don't), and what took me by surprise was the way he spoke about others. Not even once did I hear him talking good about at least One person.
Neither about People working With him (who are in equal position) Nor about People Working for him. He did CHARACTER ASSASSINATION of MEN and WOMAN equally.
I always wondered WHAT HE MIGHT BE TALKING ABOUT ME.

There was a Meeting that happened recently where I was invited as a GUEST and I went.
A Gentleman seated next to me was talking so Politely and Pleasantly with me.
The organiser of the Event came and introduced me to Him.
I suddenly sensed  CHANGE OF EMOTIONS on his face after he heard my name.
The politeness on his face vanished and He gave that Sarcastic Grin.
And the conversation that followed was an absolute GAMECHANGER.
Here how it went.  Shall call him S and myself as P.

S:-   What's your name? I didn't get you.
P:-    Priyalini Sarkar
S:-    Oh, So you are Priyalini Sarkar (and then his sarcastic Grin)
P:-    Yes I am. Do you Know me Sir?
S:-     I heard a lot about you. Finally, I met you. But you Don't seem like the person I heard of.
P:-    You heard about me !! That's cool.
S:-    Mr A told me about you quite often. That's how I know you(That grin again).
         (Then I exactly understood why his behaviour suddenly changed towards me.
         Mr A the wonderful person who does Character assassination finally reached me).
S:-    Everyone have their flaws. You do not seem like that but still it's ok. You can call me anytime.
        (He pushed his Card forward).

I smiled and looked at the other side.

S:- Your attitude is more than what I imagined. You are not asking what I heard about you,
      or you are replying me.
      Whats your problem? I am the one who should show this behaviour to you.
      What Mr.A told about you is true I guess.

Then I turned towards him and said:-
"The moment I noticed that Sarcastic Grin on Your face and when you said Mr.A spoke about me, That is the moment I know you will look down on me.
Why should I Bother what You heard about me When I know from whom you heard.
But what's so funny is that
YOU FORMED AN OPINION BASED ON SOMEONE's WORDS INSTEAD OF USING YOUR BRAIN.
So there is no point trying to prove You wrong. Moreover, I do not want to Explain me to everyone. Simple".

After 2 mins of stunning Silence, he said,
S:-  "But until you justify yourself, people can't change their opinions. Right?"
P:-   Why should I even Justify? It's you who formed an opinion. You judged.
        If I keep on reacting to every rumour I hear about me, then I will have no time to live.
S:-   I AM VERY SORRY. I Feel ashamed of my Behaviour.
        Mr.A being in that high position when he speaks about someone, others tend to believe it.
        So I did. My Apologies.

With a Smile I replied,
"EVERY RUMOUR YOU HEAR ABOUT A WOMAN,
 IS SPREAD EITHER BY A MAN WHO CANNOT HAVE HER...
OR BY A WOMAN WHO CANNOT COMPETE WITH HER."
How I am with People depends on my experience I had with them personally.
Not Every One Gets The Same Version Of ME. One Person may tell you I am a Beautiful Soul And another One Am  A Cold Hearted Baddie.
Believe them both.  I ACT accordingly.
So Unless YOU KNOW A PERSON PERSONALLY, DO NOT FORM AN OPINION ON OTHERS WORDS.
Who knows YOU MIGHT LOSE A WONDERFUL PERSON."
He sat there spellbound for a few minutes and then said,
" I AM SORRY. I WILL NEVER JUDGE ANYONE  FROM NOW".

On a Daily basis, we come across people who already have a pre-formed opinion about us,
Just through the words of someone else. But How far they are true no one cares.
The Same Sun That Melts The Butter Hardens the Clay.
MAKE RELATIONS or BREAK RELATIONS based ON YOUR OWN EXPERIENCES WITH THE PERSON.
DO NOT LET RUMOURS RULE YOUR OPINIONS.

REMEMBER RUMOURS ARE JUST SPREAD BY HATERS.

FOREVER IS A MYTH

                                         

                                  I , ......., take thee ....... to be my lawfully wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish 

TILL DEATH DO US PART, according to Holy ordinance and thereto I pledge thee my faith or pledge myself to you.

                                         This is the Main and basic vow we pledge at our wedding. "Till death do us Part" this line I engraved it on my heart the moment I recited it. Shining Bright in my Bridal Attire, A mild tension that's sweeping my mind, holding his Hand at the Precious Altar, taking vows in front of all those guests...Wow what a moment of Life it is To any girl. Yes even in this millennial century, there are Girls who treat marriage as a Precious event of their life.

                              Exchanging Rings at the  ceremony, A sense of Pride Hit me. "We are destined to be together forever and this Ring is the witness of this moment. I shall take this ring to my grave," were the thoughts I had the moment he took my hand and put the ring on my ring finger. What a bliss it was. Calling someone our very own for the rest of our lives. We are One forever declared the legal marriage certificate and so blessed everyone. Our Journey of Togetherness began.

                               Years passed on, and our forever lasted for less than a Year. When I was about to sign those DIVORCE PAPERS (those legal papers that certify we are separated) that vow strikes me again, I looked at him for one last time. That blank stare from him told me that there is nothing left to be said or to be done. Signing those papers I gifted him Divorce and gifted myself Freedom.

Now I wonder about that vow. "TILL DEATH DO US PART"...excuse me isn't it supposed to be until either of us dies.Barely an year and we already reached the end of our journey and Forever is a Joke. Then I understood, I took the vow seriously while he Doesn't even remember what he promised.

TILL DEATH DO US PART....What a joke on the face of marriage. Let me re-frame it

TILL THE DEATH OF LOVE;

TILL THE DEATH OF FEELINGS;TILL THE DEATH OF TRUST;

TILL I FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO FALL IN LOVE;

UNTIL THEN , I shall take him/ her as my lawfully wedded husband/wife.

RINGS DON'T HAVE THE LOVE TO BIND TWO PEOPLE TOGETHER FOREVER ;
nor do SIGNATURES HAVE THE POWER TO SEPARATE THEM.

It all starts and ends with 2 people. The moment Feelings and love die, that moment lay your relationship to rest. There is no use watering a dead plant.
MOVE ON....Moving on doesn't mean running into someone else's outstretched arms. It means Moving on with life,chasing your dreams,doing what you always wanted to do, breaking off those chains that tied you down till now and flying high that the Past can never reach you.
And Remember "FOREVER IS A MYTH".

P.S:- This is not just a Story or a write up. This is the inner voice of all those Men and Women who take marriage vows seriously Yet had to separate as their other half found someone else to live with or something else to live for.

ALMOST PARADISE

My approach towards Life is always Practical, Realistic and Exquisite.

Since Childhood, 
I never liked Fairy tales Where Cinderella turns into a Princess overnight
Or A Story where some Damsel in Distress awaits her Prince Charming.
One such Story which I used to laugh out loud on was A FOOLS PARADISE.
Never thought one day  I WILL BUILD ONE TOO..
Until You Came into my Life.

My Life is Imperfectly Perfect and A clean Mess.
I enjoy living it the way it is.
But With you in it, it is Absolute Paradise.
A Paradise where only Happiness and Love existed.

A Good morning quote from you made my day brighter,
A casual “how are you” message made me grin wider.
An emoticon once in a while made me blush in pink,
Penning my love for you, I always ran out of Ink.
The warm hug you gave , made me feel like home,
Holding your hand and walking, I always wanted to Roam.
This is My Paradise I built , With You as the Pillar
And our Love as the Foundation.

ALMOST PARADISE...A lovely Paradise.
Where the fragrance of love filled every nook and corner;
Where  the sound of our smiles echoed louder;
Where the promises we made became the stars that guide our future;
Where the Memories we Made,are like blooming flowers we nurture.
ALMOST PARADISE…A lovely Paradise.

Then One Day You just left without any Single Word.
And You Gifted me ABSOLUTE SILENCE.

The Days after, when I was wondering what exactly went wrong;
Those nights when I shed countless tears staring into pitch darkness...
Then
Slowly the clouds disappeared, things became a bit clear.
This ALMOST PARADISE was in reality a FOOLS PARADISE.

In the “WE” I found only “ME”
In “US” it was just “I”
You my Darling,
Never made an attempt to Make US sound as WE .
But Why Did You always make me Believe there is US.

You came and left as and when you want,
While I was waiting for you like a Dog waits for its master .
You Were just a Tourist of my Life
While I gave you the Permanent Residence Visa In my Heart,
You were a Season
While I was the Whole Year.
Damn You left everything to me and finally left me too..
This ALMOST PARADISE never existed..
IT WAS A FOOLS PARADISE.
Where Nothing remained as I Built…
Because the Foundation and Pillar were FALSE HOPES.

You made me the Damsel in Distress Character I hated the most as a kid.
And Life will never be the same again.

As Antonie Wrote in his book THE LITTLE PRINCE,

But, If you come just at any time,
I shall never know at what hour…
My heart is to be ready to greet You.

Because LOVE IS NEITHER A CHOICE NOR AN OPTION.
IT IS A CONDITION in which THE OTHER PERSONS HAPPINESS IS ESSENTIAL FOR YOUR OWN.
If coming Back to me, Makes you Happy
I will welcome you with a Smile as always.
If You forgot me already and living happily with someone else
Then I wish you all the happiness of the world.
So, I WILL WAIT.....
I will wait for you to come back one day, after you realised whats real and what actually is Love.